School’s out…Forever. Well high school, that is and my first born has graduated. The first graduating class of children born in this millennium. (interesting fact) What a feat!!
But that was the easy part..
There will be no more school lunches to be made, no more field trip volunteering and no more ‘Are you done all your homework?’ questions, to which they always answer ‘of course’ even if it isn’t done ;).
In the words of the famous Monica Geller…
Ah, the real world or what I like to call it… ‘ADULTING‘. (The practice of behaving in a way characteristic of a responsible adult, especially the accomplishment of mundane but necessary tasks.)
Now that our children have graduated and some are or quickly becoming the age of majority (18 is the legal age in Alberta), how will the dynamics change in the house. Whether taking gap year to work, travel, focus on a sport or heading away for post secondary or staying at home, these kids might have different views then we do on the rules of the home now.
One of the hardest things to over come is the social life getting in the way of the adulting. High school is all about your social life, really. Having to give up your time with your buddies or girlfriend to switching to a full time summer job has the feeling of FOMO ..(Fear Of Missing Out). The other option.. is not having money to have a social life or gas money or money for extra expenses because the Bank of Mom and Dad is closed for the frequent withdrawals. So job it is…
Then there is the struggle of curfew or not.
What time should they be home after an evening out? Is it a free for all or do you still have a curfew?. House rules in our home has always been midnight as the time to be in the door unless you are the designated driver and have to drop friends off at home. Respect – the fact that others have to get up to go to work in the morning. (I am one of those moms that tend to stay awake until the kids come home.) I guess this is where we sit down and determine what is respectful of the house rules for everyone. Being an adult also means becoming part of the discussion rather then just have the rules given to you to follow. It is time to be part of making those rules.
Communication…One thing that gets me super frustrated. …So we all have smart phones now and are all connected 24/7. Hey kids..Use that phone for something other then games and social media.!! Am I right!!>> How about letting parents know when you are going to be late so we don’t worry. Not coming home for dinner, call and let us know so we don’s set a place for you and are not waiting. Time to think about others and not just oneself.
I know our kids think because they are out of high school and 18 and soon to be on their own in some capacity, that they know it all. They want the independence, they want to spread their wings. As parents we want them to spread their wings but we also would like them to be respectful of the home they live in, even if it is just for a short time until they take their next step in life.